Stand and gaze. Don’t turn away. Look yourself in the eyes as you stand in front of the mirror. Yes, that’s you, the image of you. Say it to yourself “Me in the Mirror.” How does it feel? Are you happy with what you see and more importantly, are you “happy with how you feel” as you stand and gaze at you?
There are people who cannot look at themselves in the mirror. For reasons “known” to them, they cannot linger and look. It doesn’t feel right. They use the mirror as their preparation tool; the tool that prepares their image for the public, however, the real image is what they feel. Despite what the image reflects, the feeling doesn’t match. The image may be perfect or imperfect depending upon the eyes that behold it, and yet that is of no consequence, because there is a feeling, that lingers like a cloud that hovers over a sunny day.
What are the feelings that make you uncomfortable when you look in the mirror? Can you identify them? Is there a mental image that is attached to the feeling? Is it shame and if so why not address it? Is it guilt? If it’s guilt then what choices are available to alleviate it? Are you angry at yourself or someone else? If it’s anger, how long will you allow the feeling to tax your soul? Are you disappointed at the choices you’ve made? If that is the case, are you willing to make better choices starting right now? Are you fearful? If so, can you differentiate whether it’s perceived or real?
Whatever the feeling may be, you must stand in front of the mirror and “admit” that feeling to yourself. Admitting is the crucial first step. You must be willing to do this or you will not make any progress. You are not being asked to solve the feeling, you are merely being asked to admit there is a feeling that weighs heavy upon your heart and soul.
What is so ironic, is once you’ve acknowledge the feeling; the power that you’ve given this feeling begins to lessen. Yes, the root of the feeling still needs pruning and a healing must occur, however, “your yoke becomes easy and your burden light” because you have summoned the courage to look in the mirror and give a voice to the feeling that has held you captive. The feeling wants to be acknowledged. It can be likened to a noisy wheel that will squeak until it gets oil.
Standing and looking in the mirror is challenging especially if the feelings have been “resting without peace” for years. You have been accustomed to doing what is required for hygiene and general appearance and moving on. Yet, a few “baby steps” will make all the difference in the world:
- For five (5) days, stand with a TIMER in front of a mirror for thirty (30) seconds.
- FOCUS on your EYES ONLY!
- When the time is up STOP!
- TAKE thirty (30) seconds to write THREE (3) WORDS on what you FELT!
- After five (5) days, you will have fifteen (15) words.
- Write out the definition of each word at your leisure.
- If you decide to speak your truth, you now have WORDS for your FEELINGS!
Now that you have the words to describe the feelings that won’t allow you to look in the mirror, you must admit, it no longer seems so scary. Why doesn’t it seem scary? Because you have stood in the mirror, acknowledged your feelings and attached words. Now, what will you do with what you know?